Saturday, January 14, 2006

Again, positive perception.

Yes , one last try at " just doing it", I will project, create, within self, what is needed to prepare for achieving some worth, for what is worth and desirefull eagerness, if there is no success? Further, how does one feel when this repeated process is continually repeated. Yes, makes for tiredness in the soul and spirit. But alas I will search for the good, the good, hiding in the rocky crag of shadow, only found by the miner, the miner of good. This ones quest leads one from shallow hole to shallow hole, until finally a deeper mine is found. Mood is still, even though there is unbalance of energy. Heart feels again, for my Mother sat beside me with love, and I did need this. My room is a pile of dirt, from the lack of care of myself in the way of hygiene, but this is ok, for I have only myself to deal with in this specific space. Music plays; as always when by myself, but mostly to drown out the vulgar tongues of 3 boys in the living room. I hate the TV and radio, the TV for obvious reasons but the radio for the following: The music that they play comes from very specific sources that are of money; which means fewer selections of artist and genres. Most of these so called "artist" only sing, as well as other band members, most of the time the "other members" of the band being more talented the the "lead", leaving the lyrics to be "think tank" created by the recording industry. And last real music is hardly known about by the "majority", and mostly free, for anyone can create it. For instance I have about 1200 individual tracks on my computer from artist like ' Rei Harakami ', ' Kafele ', ' Van Delta ', ' Air ', ' Bucho ', ' Urchin ' Take 6 ', just to name a few. I apologies to all the ' collectors' out there with there hundreds of gigabytes of music, but enjoy selections of music in which I have never heard before, from all genres, from the entire earth. Radio today is a preformatted sequence of about twenty five artist with 60 minute cycles, they playing the current ' trendy ' songs of the dronelike majority, hearing these songs played over and over, berating the subconscious of there intended message, usually in of sorrow, hate, gloom, sex, and death. People making these songs the source stones of the heart, for the before metioned attributes of the selfish dark hearts. And the gluttonous frenzy of there appetites are constantly fed. My art has not been active lately, I just do not feel like doing right now, but need to. There was a piece I did with poetry written over it that I need to edit. Oh well, things just are not that bright right now, but I have not given up entirely.

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